Guy Friends that Gals Have

Do you have a gal who is just a friend? Are confused why the frequency of calls increases as exams loom closer? Or why she always hangs around with the moron who isn't fit to wear Jeetendra's white shoes? Here's a ready reckoner for you:

Just a friend
Well, you are like a show piece in my house. I will call you whenever I need you. If you call me home the chances are 9 out of 10 times she might say, "Oh Abhi, I am going out can you call me after 2 days??"

Abhi: "Where are you going Shilpa??"

Shilpa: "None of your business" and bangs the phone. (Useless fellow. Hmmph!).

Good Friend
You are like a TV remote control. I need you and I know that. But I try using you when I really need you.

Abhi calls: "Hi Shilpa"
Shilpa: "Hi Abhi. I am going out with family I will call you back. Bye"
(Shilpa calls back after two days)

Shilpa: "What do you want Abhi? Why did you call that day?".

Abhi: "Generally".

Shilpa: "Oh ok. I got to go out. Will call you later. Bye."

Will call when she needs lecture notes or some concert tickets.

Very good friend
Well you are like the pressure cooker safety value for the girl. She will need you when she wants to bring out her pain or anger on someone. Basically, she wants to talk to you. And you are special to her.

Shilpa: "You know Abhi, Shekhar is not eating. He doesn't sleep and is not able to concentrate on his studies. I think he doesn't like me anymore. And yesterday I saw him with another girl" .

Abhi: "Who is Shekhar??"

Shilpa : "My boyfriend."

Abhi: Oh! ok.

Best Friend
You are like the auto rickshaw driver. She can't live without you. And don't be mistaken. You are not her boyfriend. But you are allowed to take her little doggie around the park so that he (not you!) can do poo-poo. Abhi Shopping. Abhi Movie. Abhi Coffee. Abhi, you pay. I am having fun. Abhi is now sure that he should go ahead and propose. He dares.

Shilpa: "But I thought we were just friends. We should remain friends Abhi. Plus, I have a boy friend you know that."

Abhi: What?? (Abhi drinks all night).


Best of the Bestest Friends
Ok now you are really special. You are dad-cum-boyfriend-cum-brother-cum-everything. Ultimately you are the darling servant of the girl. You take her around. You make her project. You do her assignments. You are allowed to take her doggie around. You can hold hands on the beach. You can see the sun set with her (because she wants to do everything she drags you along). But but but... don't be mistaken. She has a boyfriend who works for a huge software company and earns 3 time the salary you earn and has a flat in Poes Garden or Boat Club or Hiranandani area.

Shilpa: "Hi Abhi. I am getting engaged to Shekhar. Shekhar this is Abhi, he is my bestest friend".

Abhi: Hi Shekhar . (Hand shake. Shekhar breaks Abhi's wrist).

Abhi is now heart broken and wrist broken.

Boyfriend
Uh... No comments dude. You're already screwed.

got this piece from a blog called AJ's blog. Good work A.J.

Silly pleasures of life…

Scrapping the sides of a ice cream cup and licking it so that none of the ice cream goes waste.

Saving the best piece for the last savour.

Making a child give you a flying kiss.

Notice people admire your new look.

Complimenting a stranger that she looks beautiful.

Finding that the air freshener in the loo matches the colour of your t-shirt and being pleased about it.

Making love (read coochie coooing) in the rickshaw.

Leaving a note of boss’s desk, saying that he has made your stay in the office an absolute pleasure.

Counting the serial number on the ticket, corresponding it with an alphabet: (eg 27 = a) and thinking of the loved one who is remembering you.

Breaking into a jig hearing your favourite song on the radio, right inside the bus (much to the annoyance, amusement of others).

Having all the possible songs on your walkman phone and yet waiting patiently for the radio to play the same song.

Fighting with God.

Getting angry on the one you love… secretly praying he makes all efforts to calm you and then fall in love with him all over again for that.

Having a scrap with a kid and getting “beaten up” and exclaiming… “God you are so STRONG”.

Looking at yourself on the windows of every parked car and wondering who the “beautiful” chick is.

Hear a love song, take him into your arms and dance a slow dance that graduates to your arms around him, feeling him and breaking the virginity of the moment with a kiss on his lips… so what if he is “invisible” to others .

Test God by not studying for the exams and praying your life off that the exams be easy.

Finding a new comment from your “second family” and smile till the smile breaks the vertices of your cheeks.

Watch the eager crowd in the office wait for you to tap their backs with a smiley hello.

Try and skip lunch once, hoping your friends force you to have a bite and be DELIGHTED when they do.

Cry watching something sad on TV, once in a while.

Stand on your head and sip a glass of water, cause you heard on Discovery channel that it is possible.

Look into the mirror early morning and shout “ooooo ooooo o oooo ooo eee oooo aaaaaa”… just to confirm that the Tarzan in you is still as Junglee as you are.

Sleep naked under the sheets.

Sing a song to God.

Add an “eshwar” to everything you speak and make people go “Madeshwar”.

Babbling with a Dog in Malayalam and expect it to understand all that you say.

Calling PAIN as Perfect Accompaniment In Need.

Hear babies gurgle as you kiss their lil bellies.

Bite a baby’s cheek.

Tell Ma that you are blessed to have a mom like her who can tolerate a pain like you.

Write an SMS to Bro and Sis, out of the blue, telling them that you love them.

Try and keep a brave face at times when you are literally F****D up.

Change your desktop screen everyday and watch each eye watching it as they pass by it.

Chat with a complete stranger.

Love it when your sweetheart calls you “Devil”.

Watching you my loved ones smile as you read this.